The Security Council session opened today with reasoned debate and collaborative editing, which may have lulled observers into a false sense of calm, but this was not the case. The Council took an abrupt dive into the blistering yet off-topic banter that clearly characterizes this committee. The instigation? A polite request for an additional sponsor on their bundle of ideas, made by Belgium. Not really controversial in nature, but as has been observed, anything can be a risky move in this committee. The regret certainly set in quickly for Belgium as the US made their case for sponsorship.
The American delegate began loudly expounding on the many benefits of being added to the paper, making their customary claims of “the U.S. knows everything” and “the U.S. is very trustworthy”. France was not having any of it and was overheard saying that “trustworthy U.S. [is] the biggest oxymoron [we've] ever heard.” When the U.K. jumped to their American compatriots defense the French delegate became even more dismissive (this may seem unlikely but we assure you it is possible.) They unleashed a devastating retort claiming that perhaps “the U.S. and U.K. should not be involved in politics, because they are too emotionally charged” a painful auditory right hook if ever we've heard one. While witnessing this political smackdown the delegation of Ethiopia chimed in in support of France, expressing that this whole argument was clearly “sourced in the United States arrogance”, talk about hitting a delegate while they're down!
Over the flurry of verbal blows being exchanged, the delegation of Belgium quietly expressed the feeble hope of cooperation between their “nice neighbor” France and the rest of the committee. When interviewed after the fight a dazed American delegate could only say that they found the comments “disappointing and disturbing”. The committee has now moved into voting block and only time will tell if the delegates can maintain cooperation for long enough to actually solve this issue.